Monday, March 31, 2008

Went to the Salt Lick this weekend

I hadn't been there in years. Had a good time with family at The Salt Lick this weekend. It was my father in laws birthday. Check out this pic. The joys of fatherhood. At least I had a beer in my hand the whole time.
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Interesting conversation in German

I just sold an old car of mine on Ebay. A guy in Germany ended up buying it. I guess the dollar is so low right now that Europeans are snagging up American cars like crazy. The amount they save more than covers the cost of having it shipped over there. My car will soon be heading to Houston where it will be put on a ship and take about 45 days to get there. I mentioned to the buyer that I speak some German. I studied it for four semesters at UT and a lot of it is still with me. I had to look up a few words but I got through it. His English is good but he is testing my German. He's nervous about this exchange and I am as well. Here's a email we swapped today. Enjoy:

Ich bin nicht genug bequem meine Deutche fur das Auto zu verkaufen. Ich habe Deutch and der Universitat von Texas gelernt, aber ich habe es nicht zeit zwanzig jahre gesprochen.

Es ist mir komisch. Letzte jahre, ich habe eine Espaniol classes genommen. Wann ich diese classe genemt, meine Deutch is zuruck gekommen. Sehr fremd, nicht war?

Sie können mir vertraugen. Ich bin zu einer Schuld ehrlich. Ich habe nie etwas verkaufen für ein schlechtes Geschäft.

Ich bin ein starker Gläubiger an kharma. Ich vertraue ihnen und glaübe das wir freunde sind. Im welchen stadt wohnen sie und was machts du für arbeit?

Sent: Monday, March 31, 2008 8:10 AM
Subject: Re: You've received a question about your eBay item, Pontiac : Star Chief

Hallo Jeffrey, wie du mir ja in einer deiner emails geschrieben hattest, sprichst du sehr gut Deutsch. Habe ich total vergessen. Wo hast du das denn gelernt ? Dann hätten wir ja alles in Deutsch besprechen können.

Du brauchst dir um das Geld keine Gedanken zu machen ist morgen oder übermorgen auf deinem Konto.

Ich freue mich wirklich sehr auf das Auto, ich hoffe ich habe auch Grund dafür.

Ich habe beim letzten mal großes Pech gehabt, war angeblich ein US Marine Colonel aber alls nur gelogen.

Jetzt hat meine Frau natürlich Angst wieder Pech zu haben.




March article for Rare Magazine

I hope you all are subscribing to Rare Magazine. If you really want to get to know Austin, this magazine is full of great idea starters of great places to go, new and old.

The new issue is out this week and I give my REAL take on the iphone. Here is what I wrote for the March issue about Guitar Hero.

This is the perfect opportunity to try to reach out to the musicians of Austin, since this is the music issue. YOUR ENTIRE BEING AS A MUSICIAN IS BEING THREATENED. IT COULD ALL COME CRASHING DOWN, and I know why. Musicians need to unite and fight this one common enemy. It’s not the sound ordinance, it’s not the fact that you can’t get insurance, your biggest single enemy in the world is… Guitar Hero 3!

I imagine by now that most of the world knows what Guitar Hero is, except for the real musicians who are out there making REAL music, with REAL guitars in REAL bars talking to REAL chicks!

Everybody else is at home, pretending to be rock stars, playing this new video game which looks and feels like a fisherprice toy. The notes come at you on an on screen guitar fret, and you mash on one of your four buttons along with music, by matching the button with the same colored button. It let’s you imagine your reading musical notes and playing classic rock songs, but really it’s a combination of Frogger and Bop the Weasel. The computer makes it sound as if you are an amazing guitarist. The players, or posers, are led to believe that they can rock. It even goes so far in the game description to say “Battle against some of the greatest legends to ever shred on a guitar and become one yourself.” I have news for them, they can’t shred. They never will. As a life dedicated musician, you should be insulted.

You should hear Guitar Hero players talk. They talk about how they “Rock” and “kick ass.” It’s an insulting joke on real musicians like you that have dedicated your lives to music. Some Hero players, after some villiage idiot button mashing, are seriously considering starting a band. I tell them it’s fine as long as they are going to take the Barbie Dream Car to their next gig at Legoland.

Thinking you can actually play the guitar from experience at Guitar Hero is the equivalent of thinking you can fly the space shuttle because you grew up on the Asteroids video game. Perhaps you are qualified to perform brain surgery because you could removed the wrench on the board game Operation.

If you haven’t encountered a Hero nut yet, you will. They are completely insane. They will talk about how they rocked it so hard they were asked to do an encore. They will reminisce about specific songs they have mastered, where their tour bus is heading and songs they have managed to unlock such as, “China Grove” or “American Woman”.

Guitar Hero goes for the jugular on all the predictable, iconic, classic rock anthems. Try sharing a living space with a Hero player as they repeat some of these classics:

Smoke on the Water

Sweet Child O’ Mine

You Really Got Me

Crazy Train


Don’t Fear the Reaper

Since you’re a REAL musician, you’ll want to throw up when the amateurs mimic the Angus Young scoot, make silly faces like Eddie Van Halen or throw their “made in China” guitar behind their head as if they are Jimi Hendrix. It’s disgusting. Picture a guy playing it with a cigarette hanging off his lip like Keith Richards. He doesn’t look cool, he looks like a douche bag… and friends that are cheering him on from the recliner are just as ridiculous. I kid you not, a friend of mine couldn’t go to work the next day from trying to do the Pete Townsend move the night before.

You are a very talented musician who I respect very much; here is why you need to put a stop to the Hero hype. People who used to love and support local music are now staying at home in their underwear, playing against a guy online who is in his respective living room, completely naked. They are taking turns playing “Rockin in the Free World” or “Wake up Little Susie” and swapping high fives with their assclown friends. These people used to love and support you as you perform your art and now they are doing the Chuck Berry duck walk on empty pizza boxes every evening.

The absolutely, most annoying thing about Guitar Hero is the wami bar abuse. It’s rampant. Hero players can’t leave the wami bar alone. Watching them molest the wami will make you want to rip it off and jam it in their head.

Did you know that Guitar Hero competitions are starting to make their way into clubs, taking money out of your pocket and food off of your plate? You have to get your gig money back before they spend it all on Stevie Ray Vaughn hats and Slash wigs. Money they used to spend on your band t-shirt is now going towards a ZZ Top beard so they can nail “Sharp Dressed Man” in a competition at the bar you used to play every Wednesday night. If you every hear anybody going on and on about how wonderful this game is, I want you to break your real guitar over their moronic head. They don’t know anything about music, they never will. For God sake, leave it up to musicians, especially in Austin, The Live Music Capital of the World. Guitar Hero is to music as vel-cro shoes, elastic pants and clip on ties are to clothing, easier to use, but kind of sad.

It gets worse. Have you heard of Rock Band? It’s not just guitar players who have lost all cred in the public. Drummers, bass players, keyboard players, you’re next! Let’s all quit encouraging these Jackholes! Stop the music abuse… now!

Thursday, March 27, 2008

Summer Heights High

this show is going to be all the rage. I don't really feel comfortable publishing the vid links on here because of the language... but this show could be huge. It's called "Summer Heights High" out of Australia. You can get some previews/episodes on
Very funny... think, The Office with high schoolers. Very funny. jb

Digitz smokin' at golf

Richie Sambora busted for DUI, check out the mugshot

Wednesday, March 26, 2008

Lunch with our consultant at Flip Happy

Pregnant man

Thomas Beatie of Bend, Oregon (--in the center of the state, east of Eugene), always knew he wanted to have kids. But when he and his wife, Nancy, first got together ten years ago, it didn't seem like a real possibility.

--That's because 20 years ago, Nancy had a medical condition which forced her to have her uterus removed . . . making it impossible for her to ever get pregnant.

--But Thomas and Nancy desperately wanted to have a kid, so they decided THOMAS would get pregnant . . . which he IS.

--Yes, you heard that correctly. Thomas Beatie . . . a MAN . . . is five months pregnant.

--See, Thomas USED to be a woman. About eight years ago, he decided to have sexual reassignment surgery. Thomas had his breasts removed and began taking bimonthly testosterone injections . . . which lowered his voice and caused him to grow facial hair.

--But Thomas opted to KEEP his female reproductive organs. Two years ago, when he and Nancy decided to try to get pregnant, Thomas stopped taking the testosterone, and they started looking into in-vitro insemination.

--Thomas says they've met a LOT of opposition. They were rejected by EIGHT fertility doctors before they found one who would help them . . . and it took them a year to get access to a sperm bank that was willing to work with them.

--Thomas says that even many of their family and friends have been unsupportive of their decision . . . and most of Nancy's family doesn't even know Thomas used to be a woman.

--Thomas was already able to get pregnant once . . . last year, with triplets . . . but there were complications and they lost the pregnancy. But this time, everything's going well . . . and on July 3rd, Thomas and Nancy expect to have a new baby girl.

Tuesday, March 25, 2008

.) Remember Mr. Belding from "Saved By the Bell"???

Check out 57-year-old DENNIS HASKINS partying it up over the weekend at a Vegas club . . .

Thursday, March 20, 2008


When Leonid Stadnyk of the Ukraine was 14 years old, he had brain surgery that apparently stimulated the growth hormone in his pituitary gland. As a result, he grows taller literally every year.

--Leonid is now 33 years old . . . he has a size 17 shoe . . . he weighs 440 pounds . . . and he's EIGHT-FEET five-inches tall. That makes him the tallest living man according to the "Guinness Book of World Records".

A British couple, Brian and Beth Willis, love their dogs so much, that when the dogs pass away . . . they TURN THEM INTO SWEATERS.

BENICIO DEL TORO as "The Wolfman". He looks pretty cool. Check him out . . .

Want to see Amy Winehouse naked? Oh.... your sick, yes you are....

Wednesday, March 19, 2008

Pee Wee doens't want us to do crack

Sexy Vegetarians

--21-year-old Shona Barnthouse of Salt Lake City, Utah, took it home for the ladies. Shona's a dancer and model who only recently became a vegetarian . . . but she says she's noticed a boost in her energy level and her muscle tone.

--And for the guys, the winner was 29-year-old Chris Allen from Chatham-Kent, Ontario, Canada. He's a professional hockey player in Hungary and has been a vegetarian for ten years. Chris says vegetarianism has made him healthier, stronger and a better athlete.

Kristy Lee Cook and Tigers

Kristy from American Idol likes to play with Tigers. Check out this video of her from a few years ago.

Tropic Thunder

The trailer for that new comedy, "Tropic Thunder" . . . starring BEN STILLER, JACK BLACK and ROBERT DOWNEY JR. as a white actor who dyes his skin brown to earn a part written for a black man . . . is online. Check it out here . . .

(--"Tropic Thunder" hits theaters August 15th.)

Tuesday, March 18, 2008

A life for sale

Here's more info on the story I was talking about today. This guy, Ian in Australia is auctioning off his entire life on ebay. You can get more details here:

Monday, March 17, 2008

The famous JB St. Patricks Day photo from 5 years ago...

I'm checking Ebay for a Swing Wing

Madonna's new album cover

If you didn't catch "Superbad" star JONAH HILL on "Saturday Night Live" this weekend . . .


--But GABRIELLE CARTERIS . . . who played Andrea Zuckerman on the first five seasons of "Beverly Hills, 90210" . . . came away from the filming of one of those Lifetime movies with PERMANENT NERVE DAMAGE. And now she's suing.

--It happened back in February of 2006, during the filming of a future classic called "Past Tense". In one scene, an attacker was supposed to choke Gabrielle's character . . . and then pull her down a flight of stairs.

Check out the video of her talking about it here:

Brittney Spears and Mel Gibson going to dinner?

Tuesday, March 11, 2008

Have you heard the latest trend? Body sushi parties.


Check out this slideshow of MICHAEL JACKSON'S Neverland Ranch. It's really gotten run down since Michael abandoned it after being acquitted of child molestation charges back in 2005 . . .

Monday, March 10, 2008

The Best Place for a woman to live

The United Nations came up with a list of the best countries for WOMEN to live. They determined which countries are best for women based on education, standard of living, long life span and purchasing power.

--The U.S. didn't even make the top 10 . . . here are the countries that did:

#10.) France

#9.) Netherlands

#8.) Japan

#7.) Switzerland

#6.) Sweden

#5.) Ireland

#4.) Canada

#3.) Australia

#2.) Norway

#1.) Iceland.

--Just so you know, the U.S. came in 12th (--out of 177 countries). ( / United Nations Development Program)

Woman punishes her kid with a pressure washer

Wouldn't you love 5 minutes alone with this mom? This is just soooo wrong...

--On February 24th, 22-year-old Nicki Ramirez was at a self-serve car wash in Orlando, Florida. (--The kind where you drive in and then wash it yourself with their hoses and soap.)

--When her two-year-old daughter began throwing a temper tantrum, Nicki's friend, who was with her, pulled the little girl out of the car. Then, Nicki sprayed her own daughter with a high-powered pressure washer in the head, face and chest.

(--To give you some perspective on how brutal that is, the force of a typical pressure washer is about 60 times more powerful than a garden hose.)

--Surveillance cameras caught the whole thing on tape . . . and the video started making the rounds on the news and on the Interweb.

--Last Thursday . . . after Nicki saw the tape on the news . . . she turned herself in to police. But according to Nicki, the whole thing's been blown WAY out of proportion.

--She says she was just using the water hose to, quote, "calm down" her daughter.

--She also points out that a nurse examined the little girl and couldn't find any evidence of injuries. Of course, since it had been 11 days since the girl had been sprayed, the nurse says any redness, welts, or bruising could have already gone away.

--And what's worse? This woman . . . this VILE creature who sprays her kid in the face with a high pressure water hose to calm her down . . . is five months pregnant.

--On Saturday, Nicki was released from jail on $1,000 bail. She's facing felony child abuse charges.

(Associated Press / Orlando Sentinel)

For the ladies... here is a shirtless pic of Jason Castro from American Idol

Pay special close attn. to his smoking, pregnant friend. Way to go.

Want to see Celine Deion's Hairy legs

Patricia Heaton (Everybody Loves Raymod) at 50 and after 4 kids... not bad

Want to read Lisa Marie Presley's blog about being mortified into announcing her pregnancy?

Click here:

Sunday, March 9, 2008

Riding with the kiddo

I truly am grateful that on a random Sunday I can impulsively go get my daughter a new bike. She had so much fun on her new bike and has so much fun she just starts laughing as we're cruising along. This is a good chance to thank everyone who has donated to Bikes for Kids over the past 11 years. You've given a lot of kids a lot of joy in their lives. As my daughter kept screaming on the bike "This is more fun than you think it is!"

What a great day.
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Thursday, March 6, 2008

David Hernandez from American Idol

.) In addition to allegedly being a male stripper . . . "American Idol" stud DAVID HERNANDEZ has also performed on cruise ships as part of a quartet called the VINYL FOUR. (--Which is probably far more embarrassing than being a stripper.)

(--Here's video of the Vinyl Four performing BILLY JOEL'S "The Longest Time". David is the one on the far right . . .)

Trailer for the Anna Nicole Smith Movies

Robert Downey Jr. will play a black man in an upcoming movies

--The movie is about a group of actors filming a mega-budget Vietnam War movie. But the writer and director get fed up with their prima donna cast, and just abandon them in the jungle, where they become involved in a real-life conflict.

--But they're such morons, they think it's all part of the movie.

--Anyway, Downey's character is a very serious, Oscar-winning actor. And because the character he's playing in the Vietnam flick was originally written as a black man, Downey's character DYES HIS SKIN BROWN, so he can play it as it was originally written.

It's a Ben Stiller Movies called "Tropic Thunder"

Do you think you could ever mistake JULIA ROBERTS for OZZY OSBOURNE??? Here's a picture that makes it seem almost possible . .

Is Lindsay Lohan Pregnant?

Wednesday, March 5, 2008

Streaker gets decked at a Cricket game

Cricket Streaker Gets Owned - Watch more free videos

Is Hillary making Obama appear darker?


Back in 1994, "Time" magazine was criticized for altering a picture of O.J. SIMPSON after he was arrested for murder . . . so that he looked blacker.

--Now some people are accusing HILLARY CLINTON of the same thing. You may have seen the new Clinton ads that show a clip of BARACK OBAMA from the Texas debates.

--A blogger who supports Obama posted a side-by-side comparison of the original footage of Obama at the debate with the footage from Hillary's ad . . . and it looks like the Obama image was doctored to make him appear darker.

--The blogger blames Hillary's group for deliberately altering the footage of Obama . . . saying it makes Obama seem threatening and scary.

--Hillary's side doesn't agree . . . but they DO admit the image was changed. Jay Carson, a Clinton spokesperson, said Obama was darkened because of a, quote, "saturation-desaturation" process that he says is typically used in commercial production.

--Apparently it's pretty common in political ads for one party to darken images of the opponent because it makes them look more sinister. Some people who saw the Hillary ad say the whole commercial was darker . . . not just the image of Obama.

( / / Wired)

This is the video by Gnarls Barkely that is can cause Seizures

(--The video is set in the early '90s on a public access-type program . . . and yes, that's JUSTIN TIMBERLAKE playing the host of the show.)

Paris pulls a good prank on us

Paris was rolling with a Shamen, a spiritual leader. She pulled a good prank on all of us. This guy is an actor.

Here's his page . . . (--It's private, but you can see his picture, next to which he writes, quote, "Burbank can kiss my Ass") . . .

--Here's his page on . . .

Adrian Greniers new thing is to hold up sings to the papparazzi. Very funny

Have you seen KFed lately?

Have you seen Lisa Marie Pressley lately?

Tuesday, March 4, 2008


Think having an iphone is cool? Wait till you read what I have to say about it in the April issue of Rare Magazine...

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Lost Fans will love this

I've always loved how Sawyer will make up nicknames for everyone. Someone put together this compilation video. Classic.

Bid on an evening to attend a movie premier with Scarlette Johanson

Check it out here:

Monday, March 3, 2008

What Made Milwaukee Famous

This is an Austin band that I'm totally into. I'm hopin they hit the national scene on this new record. Check out their new vid and stick around til the end for the surprise cameo.


Add to My Profile | More Videos

Paris Hilton has a guru to shop and hang out with

Haven't seen Tonya Harding in awhile, check out this link


AMY WINEHOUSE has been suffering from a skin infection called IMPETIGO. It's a bacterial skin infection that's commonly caused by DIRECT CONTACT . . . which is why you'll often hear of athletes like wrestlers and football players getting it.

Barack Hoopin

BARACK OBAMA has one election-day superstition: He MUST shoot some hoops. His people say that's the one thing he does for good luck on the day of a political contest. Here's a picture of Barack in action . . .

Jack Nicholsons Hillary endorsement video

Sunday, March 2, 2008

New bike

Just got my new Trek Madone today. Can't wait to ride this thing.

Custom shimano shoes

Check this out. My foot is getting sucked by a vacuum for a custom fit
cycling shoe. The shoe is heated and then all the air is sucked out.

what were they thinking?

Can I be Shaq in my next life? :)

Saturday, March 1, 2008

Bike racing

In Lago Vista doing some bike racing this weekend. Going much, much
better than a couple weeks ago. This sport is so much fun when you do
the proper preparation. Without it, it's miserable. Today was
somewhere in between. Finally bouncy g back from that jan flu. Gotta
drop some weight for sure.

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